Webzine2005 Conference Part 2.25

The San Francisco public transit is amazing! I can now count on two hands how many times I have used public transit. I feel so cool and so "city."

I arrived to the conference in plenty of time for my volunteer shift. Yep, this cheapskate volunteered for 5 hours to save $24 bucks! I was really hoping to use this opportunity to network. As some of you know, I give myself over to “The Man” Monday through Friday at a large, local insurance company. Networking is a mandatory survival skill. Armed with my best weapon, Leila my volunteer organizer, gives me my new title: “handler.” Oh yeah, I will definitely excel as a handler. I can handle anything…bring it on. My wit and charm will dazzle the Webzine organizers…maybe there will be a “Webzine Volunteer of the Year” award. Watch me handle…

Leila gave me the low down. I was to find Scott. A tall guy, with a very funky shirt. He is the current “handler” and will give me my orders. I head to the sponsor room and thinking the description was vague, I spot a very in charge looking fella, tall and funky shirt…that must be him. I ask, are you Sccccoooooottttt? That bit is to indicate that Scott is probably the most handsome man I have ever seen. Did she forget to mention his striking blue eyes; his just rolled out of bed hair and scratch my body red all over beard? So Scott, you’re the current handler...I’m a handler too. I can handle some things if you need me to handle them, I mean I just talked to someone and they said to talk to you about handling. Can I handle anything right now? Yep, my wit and charm didn’t fail me! Scott looks me up and down…says, well I think I have everything under control. Wanna make a sign. Like a lap dog, I nod enthusiastically. I made the sign. He said good sign. I panted and smiled proudly at my Master’s Lounge sign-up sheet. Anything else? No…why don’t you go see Leila maybe she'll have something for you. I see Leila and report that it is all under control. I handled the sign. She informs me that basically, I was to be there for the sponsors and speakers in case they need anything. At that moment a frantic man pops over to her. He says, I need a monitor and a 45RTX cable (something like that). Leila looks at me….I look at Leila…Leila and I spent a few seconds looking at each other, she looks toward Ryan, then me then asks Ryan…Do you think you can “handle” this?

So, Julia…you think you could sell concessions?

Oh yes, I can sell concessions, boy can I sell concessions. I’m a volunteer at a non-profit theatre and I sometimes sell concess…OK, I’ll talk to Jake about selling. Thanks Leila…uh, ok…sure, talk to you in a bit. Oh yeah, Ms. ConcesSIONS...wooooweeeee, I can SELL concessions!

Webzine 2005